ALS & Children/Youth

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Contents

Conversations with children about ALS
Resources for talking with your children and youth
Young caregivers
Supporting your children
Learn more

Download guide (PDF)
Watch webinar on talking with children about ALS
View all resources

Disclaimer Statement: The information in this guide is not medical advice. Talk to your ALS care team before making any decisions about your health or treatment. Together, you and your care team can find a treatment plan that works for you.

Last Reviewed: June 21, 2022

ALS & Children

Conversations with children and youth about ALS

Children and youth are impacted by ALS in many ways. In this guide, you will find information on how to talk with your children/youth about ALS, how young people experience caregiving, and how to support them during this time. Our intention is to provide you with information that you need today and tomorrow.

The below information is part of a partnership with Dr. Melinda S. Global Neuro Y Care LogoKavanaugh and Global Neuro YCare, a global foundation dedicated to providing education and resources for children, youth and families living with ALS/MND - across language and culture. All materials listed below, and others, are freely available at www.globalneuroycare.org.

Being direct and honest

When a family is dealing with an ALS diagnosis, children/youth are often more aware than parents may realize. Thus, beginning a conversation with them about an ALS diagnosis can be very challenging. Although you may feel you do not know how to approach the conversation, it is important to be honest and direct with your children/youth. They can sense when you are stressed and may believe that they are to blame. Moreover, they have access to the internet, which may give them either more detailed or incorrect information. Therefore, having an open conversation can prevent them from either thinking they have done something wrong, or learning incorrect information.
I would have liked an explanation of the disease in a way I could have understood.I wish someone would have told me to snuggle with him more.I wish I would have been treated more like a big kid since what was happening was so big.
How to speak with your children about ALS

The guide, Families and ALS: A guide for talking with and Supporting Children and Youths, provides detailed suggestions for conversations by age and developmental stage.

Start the conversation sooner rather than later

Start the conversation sooner rather than later
You may never feel “ready” to begin the conversation about ALS with your children. Although you should begin the conversation when you feel it is appropriate, psychologists recommend having the conversation sooner rather than later. Pick a time when you are doing something normal and calm, like relaxing at home, to put less pressure on both you and your children. If they don't want to talk, that is fine. Let them know they can come to you any time when they are ready. The key is to open the door for them.

Be honest

Be honest
Being honest with your children about ALS can be difficult, but age-appropriate honesty is necessary to maintain trust. This may include honestly sharing your own fears and concerns.

Use age-appropriate language

Use age-appropriate language
Using age-appropriate language will help your children better understand what is happening and what to expect in the future.

Allow them to ask questions and be prepared to answer them

Allow them to ask questions and be prepared to answer them
Your children will likely have questions for you. It is important that you are prepared to answer them to the best of your ability. ALS is a complex disease, and some questions will be hard for you to answer because you may not know the answer yourself. If you do not know the answer to a question, let your children know, and don't hesitate to seek out support to get the answers you deserve.

Keep the conversation open

Keep the conversation open
Check in with your children often. As the disease progresses, children may not always feel comfortable asking questions. Make sure they know that they can talk to you about what is going on at home.

Acknowledge their feelings

Acknowledge their feelings
Children experience complex feelings just like adults but often have a more difficult time regulating emotions. They may not react to the news in a way that you expect. Create a safe space for them to discuss their emotions by meeting them where they are and acknowledging their feelings.

Resources for talking with your children

Talking with your children about ALS with Melinda Kavanaugh, PhD, MSW, LCSW This ALS Learning Series webinar features features Dr. Kavanaugh’s clinical expertise and many years of research with children in families with neurological disorders, as it guides families in engaging with children and youth about ALS. Additionally, Dr. Kavanaugh discusses the several books she has written, using the children’s own words to help guide these conversations. alslearningseries.org
Guides
Guides

The following guides were developed by Dr. Kavanaugh to support parents and school professionals who have a child impacted by ALS. All guides are freely available at www.globalneuroycare.org

Real Kids Talk About ALS: Feeling Normal, Sad, and Different: graphic novel for youth, ages 7-12

The ALS experience: It’s Different and Hard: A guide for middle school youth, ages 13-18

Families and ALS: A guide for talking with and Supporting Children and Youths

School, Friends, Work, and ALS: A Young Adult Guide to Balancing Life with ALS

At School: A guide to supporting Students who have been affected by ALS

Young caregivers

Care for ALS/MND often requires multiple caregivers, including children and youth. Yet, parents sometimes feel guilty when their children assist with caregiving.

Children/youth are often involved in many areas of caregiving with ALS. They typically assist with tasks such as transferring, dressing, assisting with feeding and showering/toileting. Yet, children/youth generally receive inconsistent training, which impacts their confidence to provide care — and the quality of life for the care recipient.. With training and support, caregiving can be a source of pride for the children.

Child/youth Caregiving Training and Support

YCare LogoDeveloped and informed by clinical practice and research with families in ALS/MND, the YCare program provides hands-on training and support for children and youth caregivers.

Led by ALS/MND health professionals, trained in the YCare model, the day-long activity-based YCare program provides children and youth the opportunity to: 1) meet health professionals, 2) ask questions about care, 3) learn and adapt care skills, and 4) meet and interact with “like” peers, who are also in families with ALS/MND.

YCare is available across the U.S. and globally. For more information, contact Global Neuro YCare (www.globalneuroycare.org).

Having your children help with caregiving is not inherently bad, but it is important for them to feel supported to prevent burnout, distrust and resentfulness.

How to increase your child’s confidence in providing care:
Attend family trainings

Attend family trainings
Allow your children to attend YCare and family trainings.

Explain how to help

Explain how to help
Take the time to explain how to complete tasks and why you need their help. Always use age-appropriate language and engage trained health professionals.

Work together as a team

Work together as a team
Caregiving is a team effort, and your children are part of your team! Working together as a team will help reduce stress for everyone.

Supporting your children

Many children report that being a caregiver makes them feel good about themselves and the care they provide. At the same time, many young caregivers experience anxiety and depression, and may have difficulty in school. Being proactive about the implications of caregiving can reduce stress for your child and help build support around them.
How to speak with your children about ALS
Support groups & camps

Support groups & camps
Children have a desire to connect with other individuals that are their age. Support groups can help your child connect with other children who are going through something similar and help them feel less isolated. Hope Loves Company is dedicated to providing emotional and educational support to children and young adults who have or had a loved one living with ALS. To learn more about their programs, visit: hopelovescompany.org. 

Counseling

Counseling
Children are at a higher risk for psychosocial distress during this time. Counselors are trained professionals who can help your child talk through their feelings and manage emotional distress. 

Lead by example

Lead by example
Model healthy coping behaviors such as making time for self-care. Leading by example does not mean you have to be perfect, but children are likely to mirror your responses to challenging situations.

Engage in enjoyable activities

Engage in enjoyable activities
It is important for your children to take time for themselves and have fun. Encourage them to continue to participate in activities they enjoy such as participating in sports, playing video games or hanging out with friends.

Collaborate with your child’s school

Collaborate with your child’s school
Children may be afraid to talk with their teachers and peers about how ALS is impacting their life. It is important for families, teachers, and school counselors to communicate and ensure that children feel safe and supported at school. The guide, "At School: A guide to supporting Students who have been affected by ALS," is an excellent tool to share with school staff so they are prepared to support your child.

Learn more

The Les Turner ALS Foundation exists to guide you to answers, support you and your loved ones and advance scientific research. To learn more about living with ALS visit, lesturnerals.org/resources.
My ALS Decision Tool™
My ALS Decision Tool™
If you have ALS, you will need to make some important decisions about your health care. As your disease progresses, your ALS care team may recommend different care options. You can use this tool to learn about some common ALS treatments, answer a few questions to help you think through what is most important to you and get ready to talk with your ALS care team about your options. To learn more, visit: alsdecisions.org.
ALS Learning Series
ALS Learning Series
Our online ALS Learning Series aims to empower the ALS community through the latest information and insights. Educational webinars and interactive Q&A’s covering a diverse array of topics, from nutrition to respiratory care, are offered monthly featuring members of the Foundation’s Support Services team, our Lois Insolia ALS Clinic at Northwestern Medicine and other national ALS experts. To learn more about ALS care and research, visit: alslearningseries.org.
My ALS Communication Passport to Quality Care
My ALS Communication Passport to Quality Care
My ALS Communication Passport to Quality Care was created to make your life easier. You will be able to share health information and care preferences with caregivers. You have a lot of information to keep track of, and this tool will help you do that. To find out more, visit: lesturnerals.org/passport.
Support Groups
Support Groups
We facilitate support groups to provide people living with ALS, their caregivers and family the opportunity to share their experiences, give encouragement and help each other navigate their journey with ALS. To find out more, visit: lesturnerals.org/support-groups.

Theses resources are made possible by a generous donation from the Gilbert & Jacqueline Fern Foundation and other donors to the Foundation.

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